A-Rod Has A Diabolical Scheme And You’re Buying Into It

As some of you may or may not know, we are responsible for the internet radio phenomenon known as Yankee Fan Club Radio, a weekly radio endeavor in which we openly display our disdain for Carl Pavano, Kyle Farnsworthless, and Marty Miller the evil (former) strength and conditioning coach. So, you had to figure it was only a matter of time before we weighed in on this whole Alex Rodriguez story.

What we’ve grown to love about A-Rod, like any other individual with superstar status, is how common storylines snowball into lethal avalanches capable of burying his career as a New York Yankee. These stories would not have packed one-tenth of the punch that they have if A-Rod weren’t so openly sensitive about every word the media speak about him. Perhaps that’s the main reason why small issues surrounding baseball’s highest paid player have escalated from a couple sparks into a full-blown benzine fire.

So, this latest “headline” is really no different. On second thoughts, perhaps it’s part of a greater plan.

Earlier this week, a psychopathic loyal listener emailed the Yankee Fan Club Radio inbox with a rather interesting theory surrounding Rodriguez: “It’s his exit strategy.”

Now, for the record, we’re still maintaining that he’s cheating on his wife, but it is an intriguing theory, so we’ll give it some play. What if… just what IF it’s all one big hoax?

Much has been made of the opt-out clause in A-Rod’s contract following the 2007 season. A-Rod, himself, has addressed this very topic, asserting that he’d like to stay in New York. (Seriously, we swear. That’s what he said.) However, we’re not sure we buy any of that hooey. No, we’re not sure we buy it at all.

Could this be A-Rod’s way out of New York? Seeing as how A-Rod is already on record saying he wants to play out his contract in New York, he would need a bona fide reason to reneg on his words and, essentially, save face. And we all know that A-Rod is about as image-conscious as they come. Rodriguez is also on record saying that he wants to play in a place where he’s wanted. Therein lies the “out.”

With a little PR wizardry, there’s no doubt the $252 million man could spin this paparazzi and media ambush as a cold-hearted attack against him and his family. That would pretty much be all the ammuntion he’d need to escape from the Big Apple, earn a small Mediterrannean island in free agency and keep his reputation reasonably in tact.

The shoe fits. We’re not sure we’re ready to wear it. But it fits.

The theory presented by our listener suggests that A-Rod’s “buxom blond” in the photos was featured by his side on purpose. It also suggests that Cynthia Rodriguez’s abrupt desertion of the couple’s New York apartment was part of the scheme as well. The logic is simple: A-Rod can say it’s in the best interests of his family to move on to another environment after the 2007 season.

Keep in mind, we do have crazy listeners — some of them are even from Canada! — but we have to give them some props for such an inventive little conspiracy theory. And contrary to popular believe, the luny emailer was not Gary Thorne.